Kenny plotting his family’s downfall / Photoshopper: Arla Sutton
Attention all pet owners: a new study has hit the internet, offering us in-depth views on how to tell what our pets are really dreaming about. If your pets exhibit any of the following actions in their sleep, you will soon know the meaning of them and how to act accordingly.
Wagging their tails: although this is a common movement for your dog while awake, and usually signifies happiness, it means the exact opposite when asleep. The wagging of the tail is an action meant to shake them awake. Most likely they have fallen into such a deep sleep that they have entered another dimension. They know too much. They need to wake up.
Making noises (dog): oftentimes this means what you would think — that your dog is happy. Its barking probably just means it is dreaming about chasing squirrels, playing in the park, or eating the rich. Either way, you should not be too concerned, unless you are Jeff Bezos.
Making noises (cat): no matter what noise your cat is making, it is not really asleep. You should have known better than to get a cat. They never dream. Instead, they lie awake and plot your downfall. While their purrs may seem convincing enough, do not be fooled, for they are capable of more than you know. Remember, there are not crazy dog ladies.
Making noises (bird): similar to cats, a bird’s only wish is for your death. It is a well-known fact that birds are psychopaths and incapable of love. While you may think their innocent chirps signify how happy they are to be with you, or that they are having a good dream, you would be incorrect. It is kind of your fault though. Who has a bird for a pet? Have you seen their eyes? You are both psychopaths and you deserve each other.
Twitching/movement of the legs: this movement can occur in any animal, but it always has the same meaning. A twitching or movement of the legs signifies that the animal is trying to run away from its conscience. Even in their dreams, their mistakes haunt them, and they are desperately trying to escape. While this may seem dark and dramatic, it is very scientific. If you want to make your pet stop having these nightmares, you must first make amends for the sins they have committed. Try sprinkling them with celery salt or hiring an exorcist.