McCabe Webb’s Totally Unbiased Movie Review

McCabe Webb’s final form, one day, unfortunately / Photographer: Conrad Hogle

McCabe Webb’s final form, one day, unfortunately / Photographer: Conrad Hogle

Zombieland: The very definition of a modern movie masterpiece. Zombies, amazing humor, Woody Harrelson, amazing Eddie Murphy cameo. A glorious treasure that makes El Dorado pale in comparison. Plus you can never go wrong with Jesse Eisenberg’s glorious ivory curls of dreams.

Suicide Squad: An amazing cinegraphic beauty. With an amazing cast of characters that really did justice to the original comic book characters. Along with a soundtrack that sounds like the gods of Olympus descended from their lofty perch to softly spit their golden ichor into your ear. Unfortunately the bad reviews, obviously a byproduct of Marvel paying off the critics, kept most people from watching.

Monty Python and The Holy Grail: An utter classic. Gloriously played-out tongue-and-cheek humor. An extremely quotable movie, the basis of many an inside joke in many a nerdy conversation. A perfect use of its very limited funds, and a small amount of very fake blood. It has everything from nonsensical logical humor about witches, to a murderous rabbit. Fast talking quick-witted humor with a talented ad-libbing cast of characters, make it an extremely satisfying watch. Plus, who wouldn’t want to have Tim the Enchanter’s accent.

Deadpool: Only the highest grossing R rated movie of all time. With enough blood to fulfill even the most violent person’s desires. With my slightly less attractive body double Ryan Reynolds, literally the closest thing a human actor could get to being Deadpool, as the lead, it’s an utter blast. With the constant hilarious Francis jokes, incredible fourth wall breaks, and the beautiful Morena Baccarin, it’s many a people’s new favorite comic book based movie. Bonus points if you get the reference made by the after credit scene.

Pulp Fiction: This one’s for you, Hayden. Many people consider this to be the best movie ever, with good reasons too. Made by the god of gore, Quentin Tarantino, it features plenty of blood, and its fair share of violence, so viewer discretion definitely advised. With plenty of quotable, if vulgar, lines. It’s incredible cast lends it incredible rewatchability, as well as memorable characters. For your information, for the drug overdose scene, in order to make it more realistic, Tarantino had Travolta actually put in the needle, then remove it as fast as he could, and then for the final cut he played it in reverse. The more you know.