Pasha Bullock Returns To Old Ways

History repeats itself. Pasha Bullock has fallen victim to this ancient proverb.

Pasha Bellys

Bullock looks down upon his spoils / Security camera

Although this news is extremely surprising and saddening, his close friends and family have seen this tragedy coming for quite some time. “I knew the pressure would catch up to him,” says longtime friend Mackey Cardinell.

For the last three years, Bullock has set the bar for what a student athlete should be, but what many people don’t know is that Bullock was previously a drug-addicted, rage-filled menace to the Orcas community. After his freshman year, Bullock made a dramatic lifestyle change after he had a life altering event involving chocolate covered espresso beans and a rope swing. Ever since, he has put his all into his studies, athletics, and his community and never looked back, until this past weekend.

On Friday night, Bullock drove his tan Toyota pickup to Ray’s Pharmacy where he proceeded to hold the store up with a sharp protractor as his only weapon. Next he robbed the store of all of its Jelly Bellys and Hanukkah greeting cards before using spray paint to tag the walls in advanced mathematical equations. This was the beginning of an ongoing crime spree which has included everything from cow tipping to aggressively disproving the theory of relativity.

But what brought Bullock back to his old ways? Younger brother and upstanding citizen Ivan Bullock says, “Pash had been acting different around the house. I found a Pepsi underneath his bed and he had gotten a B+ on his latest test. I could tell that something had changed in him and feared that something worse was around the corner, but I could have never predicted this. I really thought Pasha had left his past behind him.”

Most concerned individuals believe that it was the pressure that he consistently puts on himself that sparked this tragic incident. Bullock was routinely staying up late to finish his homework and donating his time by volunteering. Nothing was ever good enough for him. While a large majority of the community is concerned for Bullock and want to get him the help he needs, the other half of the community fears his next move and has lost all respect for the teen. Will Bullock rebound from this recent episode the same way he responded in 2012? Or will Bullock continue to wreak havoc on himself and those who surround him? Only time will tell.